Photo: Sherry Hamilton

I walked into my four-year-old son’s room one evening. He had already been tucked into his bed. I was simply checking on him. When I looked in his room, he was standing up in his bed very straight, tall and very still. I asked why he was standing like that. He told me, “Mom, I am standing up for Jesus.” In the background, the song, “Stand Up, Stand Up, For Jesus,” was playing on his CD player.

That reminded me of some other stories where people stood up for Jesus.

There is a story of a twelve-year-old girl named Valya Vaschenko from Russia. She was asked by law to take an oath to “become a member of the Communist children’s group known as Pioneers.” She was a Christian. When she refused to do as she was asked, the director of her school and several other young girls were prepared to do it for her; force her to become a member. But as they read the oath and were about to put the scarf on her, she suddenly started praying to God out loud and began to sing a hymn, “We will stand firm for the gospel faith, for Christ, following His example, forward all, forward after Him.” Children like Valya, were usually heavily punished for praying and witnessing in their school. She chose to stand up for Jesus despite the consequences.

There is another inspiring story of a man named Tom White. He was an American Christian pilot who would fly his airplane over Cuba and drop gospel literature. His plane crashed one day and he was arrested by the Communists who put him in jail .

They asked him, “Who do you work for?”

Tom replied, “I work for Jesus.”

They said, “Oh, is that right? And how much money did this Jesus pay you for making these trips?”

Tom said, “I took these trips for no pay. My pay is the love and blessing that God gives me for obeying Him.”

He Chose to Sing

The Communists could not understand Tom’s answers and put him in solitary confinement where Tom was in the pitch black darkness with nothing and bitter coldness seeping in. But he chose to sing. He sang every Christian song he could think of. The guards would come and ask him what he was doing, and he would tell them he was singing about Jesus. The guard even told Tom, “If you love Jesus, don’t sing.” But Tom kept on singing.

Eventually, he was brought back to his original cell. The Communists were convinced that he was not “a super spy trying to overthrow their government.” After many prayers, letters, appeals from U.S. Congressmen and even Mother Teresa, he was released.

These are two amazing examples of people who made the decision to stand up for Jesus, no matter what the price.

The Bible says, "Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him" (James 1:12).

Will we stand up for Jesus?

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By Erika Gladden. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines. Scripture taken from the NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION ®.

Jesus Freaks, DC Talk and The Voice of the Martyrs: Stories of those who stood for JESUS: the ultimate Jesus Freaks. Albury Publishing, Tulsa, Oklahoma, 1999. pgs. 278-279 and 256-260.

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Photo:Steven Frame

The Israelis were in a tight spot. They had just made their escape from Egypt, where they had been held as slaves for many years. Numbering perhaps two million men, women and children, they now found themselves in the Sinai Desert with no food. In their despair, they began to complain and to doubt that God, who had given directions for their escape, was really with them and guiding them.

Sound familiar? You know, it’s easy to trust God when things are rosy. But when the bills are high, and the funds are low, we sometimes wonder if God really cares what happens to us.

But God was there with the Israelis all the time. They just needed to learn that lesson. God said, “I will send bread down from heaven like rain. Each day the people can go out and gather only enough for that day. That’s how I will see if they obey Me” (Exodus 16:4, CEV). God kept His word. He rained down “manna”—bread from heaven—during all the years of their wilderness journey.

One Day at a Time

There’s a lesson for us here. Just like those Israelis of long ago, we need to learn to trust God one day at a time. The Bible says, “As your days, so shall your strength be” (Deuteronomy 33:25, NKJV).

We learn to trust Him by praying to Him and studying His Word, the Holy Scriptures, every day. You can no more live the Christian life without doing this, than you can live without eating. And, just as no one else can eat for you, you can’t depend on someone else for your spiritual food.

Daily Bible study and prayer are food for your soul. They’ll build you up and give you strength for each day’s needs. God is inviting you to “Taste and see that the Lord is good” (Psalm 34:8, NKJV).

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By Bob DuBose. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines. Scripture taken from the CONTEMPORARY ENGLISH VERSION ® and the NEW KING JAMES VERSION © 1982.
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Photo: Suhendri Utet

I can’t stop thinking about Haiti. The horror of thousands of rotting bodies, people trapped for days in rubble, the agony of people not knowing if their loved ones were dead or alive. Those heart-breaking images of parents clutching their dead children are almost more than I can bear. Their devastation, their pain, their fear is overwhelming.

And I feel so powerless to help. I don’t personally know anyone in Haiti. I have no medical skills to offer and slim financial resources. Yes, I did send a text message to make a donation to a charitable organization. And I spent an evening in my kitchen baking cookies for a fund raiser, and another evening attending a benefit concert sponsored by my children’s school.

But when the concert was over our family went home together to a well-stocked pantry and comfortable beds. And I couldn’t help thinking, “There has to be more I can do.” One cannot simply ignore such raw human suffering, especially when as a Christian I know that the believers in Haiti are my brothers and sisters in Christ.

As I was reading my Bible today I began to realize that there is something significant every Christian can do, regardless of his or her skills, knowledge or financial status. It is, in fact, the greatest thing we can do because it releases God’s power to manifest itself in Haiti.

Be Specific

We can pray. Not just “Please bless Haiti” but specific, earnest prayers for things we know are within God’s will. Even if we are not personally acquainted with people, it is always right to ask for spiritual wisdom and understanding for them. We can ask that they be granted the kind of peace that can only be accounted for through knowing Christ. We can ask that they be given strength and patience to endure their sufferings (Colossians 1:9-11).

We can pray that believers will not turn away from God in their grief, but will be brought even closer to God. We can ask for the kind of faith that is strengthened in crisis. We can ask that they be reminded of the homes awaiting them in heaven and the joy of being united forever with loved ones. And we can pray that through this catastrophe non-believers will be awakened to their need for God and led to accept the gift of salvation.

I cannot give money or help with fundraisers for Haiti every day. But I can pray that powerful angels from God will walk among the people there. I can ask that hope will spring from ashes and eternal life for many will be the ultimate result of this tragedy.

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By Brenda Dickerson. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines.

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Photo: Anton Gvozdikov

I stared at the fire in discontent, wondering why the tree branch wouldn’t stay lit. We had been sitting by the fire for the better part of an hour and by that time the situation had become symbolic. No matter how long I left the branch in the fire, when I pulled it out, the flame wouldn’t last longer than a couple of seconds. I was growing increasingly jealous as I watched my friend’s branch endure the cold night and bring warmth to those around him.

I understand that it sounds silly, but like I said, in my mind the situation had become symbolic. Just like in my spiritual life, I couldn’t understand why my fire wouldn’t last in the cold air. See, my branch was old and worn, as opposed to my friend’s branch that seemed new and would light up at even the smallest feel of the fire.

When I first discovered the fire of Jesus Christ, I was like a thrilled cavemen and the smallest encounter with Him could light me up for weeks. As the trials of this life took their toll on me, God became just a part of my everyday life, I made Him smaller and smaller, underestimating His power and losing my still-growing faith. I rarely exposed myself to His fire, and my “branch” became cold.

Let It Go

At this point “just enough” of Jesus wouldn't do anymore. It was not enough to have a brief encounter with Him. I needed to be lit on fire with His love—to feel Him in my life like I used to when I was a baby Christian. I needed to stop holding my own branch, controlling how deep into the fire it would go and how long I would leave it there. I needed to let it go…into the fire.

Oh yes, it sounds crazy, and it probably is. But that’s what my Savior deserves from me—reckless abandon—to toss pride and self-reliance into the fire and let myself be completely consumed by Him. Then I would no longer live, but He would live in me (Galatians 2:19).

My life and my choices are no more. A cursory glance at the Bible becomes instead, a surrender to His Word. I was not to take the branch out of the fire at any point—surrender to Christ needed to be absolute.

So that night I tossed my literal branch into the literal fire, and wrote the words pride, jealousy, and bitterness on a literal piece of paper and tossed it in right along with the branch. And I prayed that I would have the strength to surrender the same in my heart, so that my flaws, and my self, would be utterly consumed in the fire of Jesus Christ. 

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By Raquel Levy. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines. Scripture taken from the NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION ®.

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Photo: Studiomill

“Never seen this before,” the rancher said, removing his old hat and scratching his head. We were standing next to the barn looking out towards the East. “Better saddle up and see if you can find 'em,” he continued, “it's getting dark.” With that he turned and walked away. I immediately saddled up one of the horses and started off at a slow gallop towards the rolling hills east of the ranch.

I was a fifteen-year-boy spending one year on a large cattle ranch in Washington state. Besides several hundred beef cattle, there were eighteen cows we milked twice a day. Right now they were the problem. By nature they always came to the barn at milking time, but today was a no-show.

As I continued riding my horse up the grassy slopes it became darker by the minute. Just before total darkness, I spotted the cows and managed to get them on their feet and headed back to the barn. And then the storm hit. Strong winds and rain beat down on me. It became so dark I couldn’t see the horse’s head in front of me.

Abrupt Halt

I rode on, fear now overtaking me. I had no idea where I was. Then suddenly my horse came to an abrupt halt. I tried everything but he wouldn’t budge. Confused and afraid I sat there not knowing what to do as the storm continued to rage around me. Out of the darkness a bright streak of lightning flashed across the sky. For one brief moment the whole countryside was lit up from the enormous bolt. And then I saw the reason my horse had stopped. Right in front of me was a sixty foot drop-off into a canyon below. I can still visualize that terrifying sight.

I quickly turned the animal around and rode off, still not knowing the direction to the ranch. I remembered hearing that an animal has an inherent ability to find its way home on its own. What else could I do? I relaxed the reigns and started off. Sometime later I saw the glow of the light above the barn. When I arrived the cows were already in their stalls having found their own way.

Later that night lying in the warmth of my bed, I thought of all that had happened. As I looked out my window the storm had passed and a full moon shed a soft glow into my room. And then it came to me, that verse someone had taught me when I was just a little boy: “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death . . . you are with me…"(Psalms 23:4). Wow! God was with me out there in the storm! I wasn’t lost to Him. He saw that young and frightened boy and directed that lightning strike just at the right time. That’s just Like God! He’s always right there to guide us through any storm.

Even the one you might be in right now.

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By David Snyder. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines. Scripture taken from the NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION ®.

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Photo: Dreamstime

Recently, I spent a couple of days substitute teaching for a teacher whose classes have historically been easy to handle. This time, however, it was different. Not that I don’t expect some bad days. That’s part of my job. But there were two ninth grade boys who were particularly challenging.

The first problem was that they were totally bad for each other. Having them together in a classroom and not expecting trouble is like putting a lit match to gasoline and not expecting an explosion. The “explosion” in their case was not one of violence or aggression. They just loved teaming up to produce new levels of disruption to the class and pushing the teacher to his/her limit. They would do this by using bad language, crude gestures, and a variety of other methods that aren’t worth mentioning.

The other problem was that these boys truly had no clue what they were doing to themselves. Watching them act out was like watching someone slowly commit suicide, without realizing that’s what they were doing. This became particularly evident at the end of the class period on the last day I was with them. They had tried me the entire period and I had laid out careful notes for the teacher and principal, admittedly hoping they would be justly punished. But then something else happened.

Lump in My Throat

They began using the name of Jesus very inappropriately. Being in a public school, I overlooked it for a while but then finally asked them to please not use the name of Jesus in that way. From there, they proceeded to not only continue with their swearing, but they added mockery to it by pretending to be praying to Jesus and jokingly chastising each other for their sins. I had spent the class period fuming inside over these boys’ misbehavior, but as I watched them mocking Jesus, something very different came over me. I was no longer mad. In fact, I developed a lump in my throat and I found myself saying to them, “You guys don’t have any idea what you’re doing. It’s actually heartbreaking to me.” I actually felt I was going to cry.

I think two things hit me very hard. First, I realized that even though they were making fun of me for asking them not to use the Lord’s name as they were, I didn’t feel hurt. Instead, I felt…privileged. Immediately, the words of Paul came to my mind.  “for to you it has been granted on behalf of Christ, not only to believe in Him, but also to suffer for His sake.” (Phillippians 2:29). Second, and more important, I felt so sad for Jesus because I knew how much He loved these boys even when they were rudely mocking Him.

My mind was transported to the cross where Jesus was mocked. He said to God, “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do” ( Luke 23:34). And I realized that when Jesus spoke those words, He was not only speaking them about the people mocking Him on Crucifixion Day, but that He was also speaking them about these two misbehaving boys in my 2010 classroom. I witnessed a moment at the cross that I hope I never forget. Suddenly, my desire for revenge was pushed aside by compassion.

“They know not what they do.” I wonder how many times Jesus has said those words for me.

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By Gwenn Scott Simmons. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines. Scripture taken from the NEW KING JAMES VERSION © 1982.
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Photo: Milan Vasciek

It’s the American way. You drive to your bank to either cash a check, deposit money or request to withdraw an amount from your checking or savings account. It was this sort of routine at a bank for a man we’ll call Ralph.

Ralph had received notice in his mail that he had over paid when he remitted his property taxes. Enclosed with the notice was a refund check for $9. Ralph took the check  to the drive up window at his bank. He opened the tube, inserted the check, and instantly  the check was sucked up through the tube until it reached the bank teller. When the bank teller asked Ralph how he wanted her to process the check, Ralph asked for it to be returned to him in cash.

When the tube came back to his car the cash was in the bank's customary return envelope. Because it wasn’t that much money Ralph just put it into his pocket and forgot about it. Later that evening he found the envelope. When he opened it Ralph was shocked to find not just nine dollars but nine $100 dollar bills!

Discrepancy in the Books

The very next morning he drove back to his bank with the $900. This time he went inside to ask the teller if at closing the previous day anyone had found a discrepancy in their books. The teller asked the manager-on-duty to come to her window and apprised her of this unusual circumstance. After doing some inquiring the manager told Ralph that she found no discrepancy in their books.

Ralph asked the two ladies if they wanted him to leave the envelope containing the $900 with them while they continued to check. The manager smiled and kindly said that would not be necessary.

Later in the day Ralph received a call from the bank. You guessed it. They had found his $9 check and realized there had been an unfortunate mistake. Timidly they asked Ralph if he would mind coming back to the bank to return the $900. They assured him they’d have his $9 cash that he was due ready for him to pick up when he arrived.

Ralph is a minister whose church uses the same bank for their accounts. There was no discrepancy in Ralph’s mind of what was right and what he needed to do. Ralph practiced what the wisest man who ever lived admonished in Proverbs 12:17, ” A truthful witness gives honest testimony, but a false witness tells lies.”

“The Lord gave me another chance to witness for Him and our church”, notes Ralph. “God is good.”

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By Carole Kilcher. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines. Scripture taken from the NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION ®.

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Photo: Don Stevenson

The pictures and video footage coming out of Haiti wrench my heart. I feel helpless to ease the emotional and physical suffering that hundreds of thousands are facing.

The quake has left 300,000 Haitians homeless. They’re trying to survive on the streets, their stomachs empty as they wait desperately for food. They’re lined up outside of understaffed clinics, their wounds needing attention. Death is all around them. They can’t escape its site or stench as load after load of corpses go through the streets on the way to mass graves.

In recent news I’ve noticed a mixture of stories coming out of Haiti. Some people have turned bitter, while others surprisingly are finding things to be thankful for amid all the tragedy.

For instance, there’s the story of Reverend Eric Toussaint. His church, once a proud cathedral, is just a mere shell surrounded by rubble. Nevertheless, he resumed Mass there following the quake for a small congregation of exhausted survivors. “Why give thanks to God?” he asked them. “Because we are here.” ¹

And there’s Florence Louis. She has two children and is seven months pregnant with a third. With thousands of other Haitians, she gathered where U.N. workers were handing out high-energy biscuits. Lois clutched her allotment—four packets of biscuits—and said, “It is enough because I didn’t have anything at all.” ²

There is No God

But then there are the stories that stand out in stark contrast. Ones like that of Remi Polevard whose five children lay dead beneath the rubble of his home. Speaking of God Remi cried, “How could He do this to us? There is no God.” ³

And there is the nameless woman in the orange dress. She was seen walking the streets downtown where corpses were being burned five days after the quake. Pulling out a copy of the Bible from her dress pocket, she flung it into the fire….

When I read these stories I thought, “The Haitians are very much like us. We both have a basic choice when tragedy strikes.” We can blame God, or we trust Him. We can run from God, or run to Him. We can hate God, or we can love Him.

To say there is no God is to say there is no plan or purpose. To fling our Bibles into the flames is to throw away the very words that bring comfort and hope. To hold on to God and the promise of Heaven will not only help us make it through this life, but will take us on to eternal life. A place where God has promised, “I, the Lord, will be your everlasting light, and your days of sorrow will come to an end” (Isaiah 16:20).

We cannot choose what trials come, but we can choose the outcome. We can choose our attitude, who we blame, what we learn, and what we do with God. The best choice is holding on to the One who will someday come to our rescue and end our days of sorrow.

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By Nancy Canwell. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines. Scripture taken from the CONTEMPORARY ENGLISH VERSION ®.

¹ http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,583241,00.htmlseveral
² http://www.usatoday.com/news/world/2010-01-17-haiti-sunday_N.htm">http://www.usatoday.com/news/world/2010-01-17-haiti-sunday_N.htm
³ http://www.dailynews.com/news/ci_14213139?source=rss
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Photo: Dmitry Naumov

I keep forgetting her. My brand new baby girl.

There's been nothing traumatic yet, but I just keep forgetting that she exists. I'll be driving along and suddenly remember that she is behind me in her car seat. Or I'll be talking to someone and mention going somewhere with my boys—and they'll say, “Aren't you taking Kira, too?” Or she'll be quietly asleep upstairs and I'll be downstairs and it will suddenly hit me KIRA EXISTS! The worst is that I have dreams of forgetting her for real. Of accidently leaving her home when I go to dinner or something like that.

Unfortunately, this is not a totally unfounded fear.

When Jake was a baby, we were living in England. One day when he was very young, I went to our little local market, parked in the parking lot and walked the 15 steps to the door. Bought some lettuce, asparagus and tomatoes, paid, and walked back to the car. Halfway back I PANICKED seeing that there he was, asleep in his car seat. I had left him in the car.

Luckily, the weather was cool, he was locked in and I had only been away from the car for maybe 4-5 minutes. But these are the things people call Child Protective Services for—and I'd done it.

Imprinted on My Mind

I'm not sure why this happens. Maybe it’s a mixture of post-natal brain hormones and the blowing of all your previous paradigms by the arrival of a new member of the family? Whatever the reason, it is a little scary and I'm looking forward to having her so imprinted in my mind that it stops happening!  

In the mean time, I have a new procedure. Before leaving the house or starting the car or getting out of the car, I've started counting my children! (But my husband is on his own. I can't remember him, too!)

Luckily, our Father in heaven does not have any problems with remembering His children. Isaiah reminds us that even when we accuse him of forgetting us, He is there.

“Yet Jerusalem says, “The Lord has deserted us; the Lord has forgotten us.”

“Never! Can a mother forget her nursing child? Can she feel no love for the child she has borne? But even if that were possible, I would not forget you! See, I have written your name on the palms of my hands””  (Isaiah 49:14-16a).

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By Joelle Yamada. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines. Scripture taken from the NEW LIVING TRANSLATION © 1996.
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Photo: Dreamstime

Years ago a man purchased a remote castle in Spain. Vandals were destroying the old building, so the man hired a builder to put a protective wall around the castle. Weeks later the man checked on the builder’s progress and nothing had been done. The builder complained, “I cannot find any materials to build a wall.” The owner replied, “I don’t care what it takes, build a wall!”

The next time the owner visited his castle, he smiled at a new wall being built around his valuable citadel. But when he walked through the gate he discovered the builder had used materials from the castle itself to build the wall. His fortress was being destroyed!

Our hearts are like a castle. Some of us have built walls around our hearts to protect ourselves. Perhaps we have been hurt so deeply in life that we are determined to never allow anyone or anything to hurt us again. But these walls to protect ourselves can end up destroying our hearts. We can be so walled in, that we can no longer love those around us. We close up emotionally. Our hearts become hard toward others. Our spouses and children can be deeply wounded because we are unavailable relationally.

Born Again

There is only one solution to a walled-in heart. Jesus says in John 3:3 that we must be born again. We need to let the cold, rock walls around our hearts come down so that God can give us new hearts. A Scripture verse I have memorized and often quote in my own prayer time is this: “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh” (Ezekiel 36:26).

There is nothing wrong with walls to protect you. It is not wrong to say to people, “You may come this far, but no further.” The problem is not building a wall. The problem is building a wall without doors or windows. These types of walls keep all people out—not just people who might hurt us, but people who love us as well. God wants you to love and be loved. You cannot give love or receive love unless you open your heart. If your heart is like stone, or if it is hidden by thick, cold walls, open your life up to the God who can give you a new heart.

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By Curtis Rittenour. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines. Scripture taken from the NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION ®.

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Photo: V. Van Rensburg

So I have one...  okay, so I have this little fear. A phobia of princesses. Little girls who insist on putting on one of their 47 princess outfits each day and fall on the floor in a pile of tears if they are told no. Little girls who argue with their mothers about whether an outfit matches or not. Girls who prance and pose and turn their brothers into frogs. I'm flat out terrified of them.

Mostly because I wasn't much of one myself.

I'm not saying I didn't like pretty dresses and getting my hair done up for church. In fact, one Christmas my grandmother made me a beautiful blue floor-length dress. I remember every detail of its Laura Ashley-like qualities. And I remember coming downstairs dressed in it for the first time and my dad saying, "You look very pretty in blue." (One of those complements that stays with you forever.)

But I don't think I would ever have qualified as a “princess.” So I had some conflicting thoughts when a box arrived from my Mom last week. Inside was a dress for my baby girl that Mom had created out of a black and white striped t-shirt dress.

But she’d added a black and white tutu. A TUTU!! A foofy, frilly, tutu. Like for a princess or a ballerina.

I sighed.

And then I raced upstairs to put it on Kira to see HOW CUTE she would look!

Girl-iness in Bible?

You won’t find a lot of girl-iness in the Bible. For generations, women have had to read themselves into the Bible. Substituting “men and women” in our minds as Scriptures are read. Imagining how the wives and sisters of the male characters in the Bible might have responded to various situations. And that’s okay. I know the Bible was written in a very different cultural time than our third millennial church, but that’s why Jesus’ choice to call the church his bride (2 Corinthians 11:2) is so fun for me.

For many women, there is no girl-ier day in life than a wedding day. The hours spent before in preparing and choosing and matching and styling and decorating are unfathomable. And so I love the imagery that is conjured up for many women—imagery that can only be truly understood by women—when Jesus speaks of us as his beloved bride. What a gift.

It’s a reminder in the midst of a very male-centric Bible that Jesus loves me in the way that every little girl, princess or not, dreams of being loved and cherished on her wedding day.

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By Joelle Yamada. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines. Scripture taken from the NEW LIVING TRANSLATION © 1996.
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Photo: Dreamstime

When Christian couples are dating, they are often encouraged to choose their dates carefully. Not only the person they date, but also the actual date itself. Caution is given for when it is appropriate to be alone and when being alone should be avoided. Suggestions are given for choosing things to do that would allow each person to get to know the other, especially the more weighty traits such as spirituality. As a result, the couple will often choose dates that involve church events.

When a couple marries, however, it seems that the spiritual-based dates seem to diminish a little. Have you ever noticed that? Part of that may be because the caution needed for unmarried couples to avoid the sexual temptation has now been removed. But is that the only reason to have spiritual dates? It shouldn’t be. Especially if the married couple wants to maintain the spiritual strength they have begun together as a couple. Here are some ideas for spiritual dates. You will, no doubt, be able to add some of your own.

Ideas

• Check community announcements for church activities that are open to the public. It doesn’t always need to be your own church.  For example, my husband and I enjoy going to an old-fashioned sing-along that is held in an historic church in our community once a month. People from all faiths show up and sing out of hymn books and the echo of the blended voices in that old church never fails to thrill my heart.
• “Double date” by having Bible studies with another couple. Or maybe even just watching a Christian film together. An excellent choice would be a very inspiring Christian story called “Fire Proof.” This film is used often in church events.
• Cook a meal together, trying some new healthy recipes.  When couples are dating, they cook together, so why not continue after you’re married?  Try something really different like homemade hummus or a new way with baking bread.  If it’s a success, great!  If it’s a bust, you still had the fun of trying it together.
• Take a walk in nature. Be creative by walking the same path in daytime and then another time at night. How is it different? What are the different sounds of creatures? Include all of the seasons, too. Winter walks can be very invigorating, requiring much physical contact for warmth!

Everyone knows how important having dates is to keeping a marriage healthy and alive. But marriage can be even healthier when dating includes your Matchmaker!

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By Gwen Scott Simmons. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines.

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Photo: Lawrence Long

There are thousands of radio waves surrounding you at this very moment. Unless you are tuned into any of them, they will pass you by unnoticed. Without a receiver to zero in on a certain frequency, you cannot hear or see these invisible signals. Yet, these unseen waves are there.

Several years ago I wanted to be an amateur radio operator. I studied hard to pass the tests that would allow me to go on the air. Until I had my license, I could only listen. During this time, a friend loaned me an old tube receiver so I could at least begin to “listen”. One afternoon I strung a simple, single wire antennae across the roof of my house. Then I climbed down the ladder and ran excitedly into the house and hooked up the wires to the receiver. I still remember the thrill of warming up the old tube radio and hearing voices of people from around the world!

The Bible tells us, “Be diligent to know the state of your flocks, and attend to your herds” (Proverbs 27:23). In order to know the state of your family or your children, you need to tune in to them. Like my radio receiver, we need to set up our antennas (our eyes and ears) and tune in to our family in order to know “the state of our flocks.” Here are four quick suggestions for tuning in to your family:

Four Quick Suggestions

1. Recognize that tuning in takes time. If you expect to take a quick pulse reading of your children’s hearts, forget it. Relationships take time. Men often measure how they are doing with their family by what they “do”. It takes time to listen and “sense” the hearts of others.

2. Use your ears more than your mouth. That sounds a bit obvious, but some people dominate conversations and don’t stop to deeply listen to their family members. They are focused on their own agendas, not the hearts of their spouse or kids.

3. Use your eyes. A lot of communication is nonverbal. When you ask your son, “How are you doing?” and he physically turns away from you while saying, “Fine,” there’s probably a lot more going on under the surface.

4. Ask questions. You can know the state of your family by asking basic questions, like, “What do you think about…” and “How do you feel about this?” or “I’d really like to know your thoughts on…” And then really listen.

There are lots of radio waves coming from your family members. Unless you flip on your receiver and really tune in, you will miss a lot of communication that will let you know “the state of your flock.” Take some time today to set up your antenna and receiver and listen.

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By Curtis Rittenour. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines. Scripture taken from the NEW KING JAMES VERSION © 1982

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Photo: Helmut Gevert

Two of my 10-year-old son’s best friends are Mark and Miles. Not only are these boys brothers, they’re twins --identical twins. They are so much alike that sometimes their own parents have to stop and take a second look to tell them apart.

Although our families have been friends for over two years, I still can’t tell the boys apart with any sort of consistency. One of them had a bad scratch on his nose for a while, and that really helped. Then it healed and I was back to guessing again. The twins often dress alike, or sometimes they switch shirts—one will be wearing a certain shirt and the next time I see them the other one is wearing it! It’s so confusing that I’ve almost given up trying to identify them correctly.

Mark and Miles, however, seem to enjoy the confusion they cause. (I guess that’s better than being constantly annoyed at people for calling them by the wrong names.) For example, one day the boys decided to try fooling Mark’s music teacher. Since Mark plays the violin and Miles takes piano lessons both boys can read music. Miles pretended to be Mark, holding the violin properly and managing to squeak out Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star. But it didn’t take the teacher very long to figure out that something was not right with her student. Indeed, this was not her student at all, but a “look-a-like” imposter!

You Have to Know Them

When I asked my son for clues in telling his friends apart he replied, “Oh, it’s easy, Mom. You just have to know them.” Obviously, the reason the twins don’t seem alike to him is because he has spent considerable amounts of time with them, talking, laughing, going for hikes and working on projects. He knows their facial expressions, mannerisms, habits, voice intonations.

As I consider my own Christian growth, what lessons can I learn from my son and his friends? I must ask myself: Am I able to accurately distinguish between truth and error? Can I tell the true identity of people—are they really who they profess to be? Have I spent enough time with Jesus and in the study of the Word to avoid being deceived? Do I know Jesus well enough to tell Him from an imposter?

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By Brenda Dickerson. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines.
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Photo: Dreamstime

Three years ago, when we moved to Japan with the U.S. Navy, we had a fairly simple plan for our time on Okinawa. It went something like this...

During our time in Japan, we will:

1. Become fluent in Japanese. (Duh! I'll be there THREE years—it's a TOTAL given!)
2. Travel a lot. (We will limit our first year travel to neighboring islands, second year to mainland Japan destinations, and third year to other possibilities like Australia!)

So how'd that go??

My Japanese is pitiful. I can speak well enough to tell Jake's teachers he won't be at school on Wednesday—but that's about it. I took some lessons from a wonderful Japanese woman, but I never studied. And living on base, it just wasn't as necessary for me to get out there and really learn.

And travel? Nope. We never went to the mainland of Japan or any other country. We went twice to some of the outer islands and we did spend some weekends away—but those were all to go camping at the beach.

Three years later, I'm feeling a lot of regrets for all the things we haven't done while stationed here. But there are two big reasons we did not fulfill our plans.

During our time in Japan, we:

1. Had two babies.
2. Decided to get out of debt.

The babies thing means I was slowed down a bit and that I have a zoo in my house that possibly keeps me from more Japanese classes or scuba diving. But the debt thing is what has really kept our life more... simple. We first heard Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University CDs about 18 months ago, and then took the full course a year ago. We now have a solid, monthly, cash-based budget. We've paid off three credit cards and one of Brent's college loans. We have made plans to have no car payments when we go back to the States and hope to qualify to buy a house this spring.

The last three years have not been what I had planned or expected. But there were unexpected joys and experiences along the way.

I’m reminded of the way Joseph’s life turned out. At the start, it seemed like a pretty charmed life. The favorite son, a glorious future. Then he’s thrown in a pit. And the following years are a roller coaster ride of life. An unexpected life. One that glorified God at every turn. (Genesis 37-41).

And I guess that is what matters the most. Not that I didn’t get to see the ice festival in Sapporo or that I’m unable to carry on a conversation with a local Okinawan. What matters most is that through the twists and turns of our everyday life, we continue to give glory to the One who makes the rough places plain and the crooked paths straight (Isaiah 40:4).

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By Joelle Yamada. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines. Scripture taken from the NEW LIVING TRANSLATION © 1996
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Photo: Ryan von Schwedler

Drip! Drip! Drip! I can understand why this sound makes people feel a little edgy. It’s three o’clock in the morning and I stumble to the bathroom to see what fixture is causing the annoyance. The culprit is the bath tub faucet that I attempt to tighten and quieten. But it doesn’t stop!

The quietness of the house only amplifies each droplet of water that hits the porcelain. I fold up a dry wash cloth and place it under the faucet, but I know it will only bring temporary relief to my ears. As soon as the wash cloth is full of water a puddle will form, and my ears will again be assaulted by this ridiculous “sleep-stealer.”

I lie back down and await the inevitable. Drip! Drip! I promise myself that in the morning I will put a permanent “fix” on that noisy tub and I drift in and out of a restless half-sleep throughout the remainder of the night.

When I encounter a night like this, I am reminded that in a similar way there are little spiritual troubles in my life that need to be taken care of. From time to time I recall the small, seemingly unimportant spiritual “drips” that keep my mind from the quiet rest it needs.

Spiritual Rest-Stealers

I think about those little things that should have been taken care of, but weren’t; like the apology I should have made to my child when I spoke crossly to them, or the sincere thanks I should have expressed to my wife for the wonderful job of a dinner well prepared. They’re not glaringly obvious during the day when I’m busy, but at night they loudly pronounce their presence like a dripping faucet.

During these times of spiritual un-rest, I’m thankful that God has the ability to quiet the frustrations of a troubled soul.

“My people will live in peaceful dwelling places, in secure homes, in undisturbed places of rest” (Isaiah 32:18).

Knowing that my Creator will help me take care of unfinished business in the morning when everyone awakens brings spiritual peace to my anxious heart. I can now drift off into untroubled slumber. I’ve found a permanent “fix.”

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By Michael Temple. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines. Scripture taken from the NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION ®.
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It was Friday night and my family was nervously sitting in a circle in our living room. Every one had a cup of hot chocolate in their hands, looking at their Father and wondering what he was up to now. This was an important event for me. I had prayed about it all day and now the moment had arrived.

Those of you who have children know the challenge of keeping peace among siblings. There is often conflict of one sort or another. Conflicts generally arise from someone feeling they were treated unfairly. Many times issues are never resolved and this can build resentment and more conflict.

On that Friday night I broke the silence and explained to the kids that each week we would have a family council. I then proceeded to lay out the rules for our first “official” council:

Rules

1. All will have an opportunity to speak and share their feelings of frustration with anyone in the family including Mom or Dad.

2. While speaking there will be absolutely no interruptions.

3. All will have the freedom to say whatever they want without fear of retribution.

4. When everyone has a turn Mom and Dad will work with you to resolve your issues.

5. Expressions of anger or arguing will not be allowed.

6. Mom and Dad will not discuss their issues in this council.

With some apprehension I turned the siblings loose, starting with the youngest. It worked beautifully. The frustrations poured out, some authentic, some rather petty. But they spoke and we listened. I remember when one child finished expressing his pent-up feelings he took a deep breath and exclaimed, “Boy that felt good.” I knew then we were on our way to something good for this family.

When everyone had finished their turn my wife and I attempted to bring resolution by addressing the problems raised. For instance we would ask one of the children, “Why do you think your sister feels the way she does? Can you think of what you could do differently next time?” If there was a good response we would all clap in confirmation. We did everything we could to make this time a positive experience so the children would look forward to the next council.   

When a “complaint” was directed at Mom or Dad we made sure we responded by giving an example of fairness and understanding. Confessing we made a mistake and asking for forgiveness was not only the right thing to do, it was another great teaching tool for admitting wrongs.

My wife and I always ended the counsel by asking the children what we could do as parents to make their lives better. And then we would sneak in what they could do to make our life better.

Single parents can also start a family council, and this is especially helpful for blended families. Why not give it a try? All you have to loose is some hot chocolate.

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By David Snyder. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines.
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Photo: Donice Palmer

Vacations are journeys that bring us to new places, sights, and insights. Our recent family vacation had many points of interest and stunning beauty, but I have chosen one special memory and time to share with you.

After spending three days with my family in the Rocky Mountains, we were lamenting the fact that it was time for us to leave and continue west. We had fallen in love with the mountains and the breathtaking views, so we made one more stop before heading back to the motel. 

We saw a large herd of elk grazing in the field, pulled off the road, and hiked over closer to the herd. Occasionally, an elk would stop grazing momentarily to glance at us, but overall they seemed oblivious to us. 

For a while, we just stood and observed the elk while soaking in the scenic setting. Then my son, Caleb, and I climbed a knoll and found yet another field of elk with more snowcapped mountains in the distance. It was amusing to watch the elk wade through the cold mountain stream, then step out and playfully run with each other. I was captivated by the peacefulness and striking beauty as I took pictures and walked in the midst of God’s creatures.

Oneness with Nature
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Photo: Nina Vaclavova

I recently gave birth to our third child—a fabulous little girl. She and her two older brothers (4 and 2 years old) are the basis for the question I hear most often lately: “So, how is it with three?”

The questioner always looks a bit pained when asking, and I’m always tempted to say, “OH, IT’S BEEN SO EASY” just to see if they might keel over in disbelief. But, of course, that is never going to happen—because it's not easy.

To be honest, thanks to the help of my husband, the big outings like going out for the afternoon or going to church really are pretty easy. The difficulty is in the little things.

It's the total impossibility of picking up our mail at the post office...

And the laughable idea of getting some tomatoes from the corner market.

The amount of time that it takes to get all the kids into the car and all the kids out of the car for a quick errand like opening and closing my mail box door or grabbing some tomatoes, and then getting the kids back in the car and then getting them back out at home is just a big FAT joke. It's a three minute errand that takes 45 minutes. It's just silly. And I won't do it.

Out of Tomatoes!

So, our mail hasn't been picked up for more than a week. And I'm out of tomatoes.

Fortunately, those things can wait for a day when my husband is home and I can run out and do six errands in an hour, instead of spending an hour on one errand! What can’t wait is the time I have/want/need to spend with the Lord.

Back in the day (pre-kiddos), my devotions could happen anytime—a quiet afternoon, at the breakfast table or before bed at night. Anytime I chose! That is laughable now. You should SEE the group of us at breakfast! My bible would look like a mini-food fight if I tried that. And quiet afternoons? If they exist, I’m usually sleeping along with the nappers! And by bedtime I can barely keep my eyes open. I can’t have devotions like I used to. That would just be silly.

But I have to do it. I want to do it. I need to do it.

So, I’m going to have to bite the bullet. Get up early. Before the troops. Before the craziness of my wonderful life begins. If I want to have a loving heart to guide my decisions and my discipline and my leadership of the kids through each day, I think I’m going to have to let the Lord work on it before any of the other simple things begin.

It’s just that simple.

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By Joelle Yamada. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines.
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Photo: Hemera

Since I became a parent, I have found increasing reasons to admire my own parents. Parenting is a tough job and we all tend to do it with good intentions and many mistakes. And of course, since I was my parents’ first child, I believe that I was probably the experimental child!

I greatly respect the sense of security that my parents provided for me. They were married for 55 years. They lived on the same farm, in the same house, that they called home for all of my life. My father was born in that house and both of his parents died there. Dad made every effort to keep my ailing mother “at home” as long as humanly possible. She used to comment on how many times her own father had moved his family and the various possessions that they had sold or lost. Even though she would have preferred to travel more, I think she too benefited from a solid sense of home.

Reliable Cycles

I have deep emotional roots at that farm and in that community. My grandparents worked hard to buy and keep 150 acres of land, which their only child inherited. During my childhood, I walked in every field, and understood the nuances of each season: crops, pests, weather, and holidays. All of this was part of the reliable cycles of life. My address and phone number never changed, and I always knew where my bedroom could be found.

My parents might have had other education, business opportunities or choices if they had moved. However, because they chose roots over transitions, four generations of family have had memories at our home.

A heritage of security and commitment has enhanced my spiritual life. I value the hills and valleys of the marriage experience and what that refines in one’s character. I also believe that I can better appreciate the meaning of “abiding” in God’s love and the gift of an eternal heavenly home because of my lifelong childhood home.

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By Karen Spruill, M.A. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines.
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Photo: Donice Palmer

Growing up on a farm has given me an appreciation of animals and many opportunities to observe them. I’ve marveled at the devotion of the goose and gander to their goslings. My heart has been warmed when I’ve seen cats curl up with our St. Bernard. But of all the animals we’ve ever had on the farm, two stand out in my mind because of their unique friendship.

Dolly the donkey has always lived with the cows. Even though she is smaller than the cows, she often bosses them around. In the spring when the cows gave birth, she acted as a nanny to the calves. She seemed to enjoy "babysitting." If any dogs or other intruders came into the pasture, she would promptly and zealously chase them off. For many years, this was Dolly’s routine and life.

Rosie the goose hatched in an incubator after an egg was found on the bank of our pond. As a gosling, she lived in a box in the kitchen and would often go along on short car rides with us. Rosie became our pet. When she grew up she was not accepted by the rest of the geese. She preferred to stay in the yard or be on the front porch looking in the window.

Two years ago, before Christmas, we noticed that Rosie was in the field with Dolly. We thought that was unusual, but figured she would go to the pond when it got colder. We were wrong. Rosie stayed in the pasture with Dolly, and they became inseparable friends. In fact, Rosie did more than just stay close to Dolly in the field. She honked loudly and flapped her wings wildly while running towards anyone that came too close to her friend. When hay was tossed out for the cows, Rosie stood in the middle of it and tried to fend the cows off so Dolly could have more of the hay. 

A Downside

As interesting and sweet as this rare friendship was, there was a downside and lesson to be learned from this odd couple.

1. Rosie no longer spent any time on the water. She didn’t get the cracked corn fed to the geese and ducks that came to the pond. She ate grass and hay alongside Dolly. Dolly accepted this friendship although she had not sought it.

2. When the cows had their calves in the spring, they wouldn’t let Rosie come near their babies. They would charge at Rosie who was always near Dolly. This meant that Dolly lost her position as a nanny.

The friendship between Rosie and Dolly is amusing, but it also reminds me of a lesson parents often share with their children. We should choose our friends carefully. Friends influence our lives. Some friends may even lead us on a wild goose chase. That’s why we need to know Jesus as our best friend and choose our other friends wisely.

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By Donice Palmer. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines.
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Photo: Stephen Vanhorn

Like five million other Americans, you or someone you’re close to may be singing the pink-slip blues. But losing a job doesn’t have to be all gloom and doom. Sometimes great opportunities can arise from initially discouraging circumstances. Before you panic, take a step back and consider two important questions: How will you pursue a new job, and what are you going to do until you land one?

First, check out your benefits. You may have a variety of unemployment benefits from the job you’re leaving, such as a lump sum payout or a severance package. Talk with the human resources department about your benefits and what you must do to activate them. Immediately acquire the documents you need to receive your government or state unemployment remuneration.

Next, develop a budget. According to recent statistics, it could take a minimum of nine months to acquire another job. Find out what it has been costing you to live per week or month. Then look at areas where you can make your dollars stretch or eliminate unnecessary expenses. Adopt the “use it up, wear it out, make it last” attitude.

Third, plan your debt. If you are in the habit of paying additional money toward the principal of your mortgage, pull back to the minimum payment. Be careful not to add any new debt, such as a home equity line of credit. Remember, debt is a problem, never a solution.

Now for the job search itself. With thousands of people replying to newspaper ads and placing resumes on career websites, consider alternative approaches. Here are four strategies to get you started:

Strategies to Get You Started

1. Donate your time to a local non-profit organization. By involving yourself in the daily operations you get to know the staff, and if you’re reliable you may end up as a new employee. Even if you don’t, volunteering will help you continue to feel useful and productive.

2. Network big time. Make a list of work associates from the last ten years you could contact. Then let them know you’re looking for a new opportunity.

3. Think big. Take advantage of this down time to explore options that may lead a new career. Perhaps this is the time to cultivate your ultimate dream job.

4. Consider moving. While this may seem to be a drastic measure, repositioning yourself to a low unemployment area will reduce the job competition. Look at it as an opportunity to experience another part of the country. Rent out your current home while you discover new opportunities.

Whatever happens, keeping a positive attitude will be to your advantage. And sooner or later your pink-slip blues will change to a new tune.

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By Brenda Dickerson. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines.

Sources: “How to Survive a Job Loss” Debt Proof Living magazine, April, 2008.
“Yes, You Can Find a Job in Tough Times” Bottom Line Personal magazine, November 15, 2008.

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Photo: Andreas Gradin

I am a dog-lover. So recently when friends invited me to accompany them and their dogs to a dog confirmation show I jumped at the chance.

We left early Sunday morning because judging the retriever class of dogs was the very first event on the International All Breed Canine Association show’s agenda. Owners had to check in then find their ring location in the great arena and be ready when called.

My friends raise white golden retrievers. Their entire family shares the chores and responsibilities of their home business. The parents are teaching their girls additional skills by having them learn how to properly handle the dogs in the ring in front of the judges. To ease the girl’s nerves, as well as to give the two dogs a chance to become acquainted with the sounds and smells of the building, we walked around the circumference of the arena.

Some owners had just one pooch; others had several.

I learned that most owners were there to have their dogs accumulate points, titles and advanced classifications. I learned that the judges give each animal a written critique and a rating number of how well the dog conforms to the International "UCI" breed standards. The judge’s comments, points, awards and titles can increase the worth of a particular dog and bring more dollars for each off spring or stud fee.

Judging

On this particular day there were four different rings where the judging of the various breeds was to take place. We selected a spot to wait near ring number two. At the exact time scheduled, the judge called the arm band numbers of the first owners welcome to enter the ring with their dog. Then it was time for judging the two white female puppies my friend’s girls were showing.

Since there were only two white females on the schedule, one sister’s dog would be judged against the other sister’s dog to see which one the judge felt was closest to the breeds’ ideal. Diamond won a metal on a ribbon and her note from the judge. Sophie got a nice note from the judge but was eliminated.

Because Diamond got the judges nod on the first round of judging, we had to wait until it was time for her to compete again against all the puppies in the retriever class for the “Best of Breed”, puppy class title. If she were to continue to win she would eventually be eligible to compete for the title of “Best in Show”. That never happened. During that round she misbehaved. Sadly she placed last in that round and we drove back home.

As I later reflected on my experience watching the girls, and the judges need to determine which dog in the ring was the most perfect representation of the breed, I became very grateful that God doesn't work that way with humans. There is no best of breed, no best of show!! We are judged on His merits, not our own.

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By Carole Kilcher. Copyright © 2010 by GraceNotes. All rights reserved. Use of this material is subject to usage guidelines.

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